Our experience was, indeed, hard and bizarre. But it was also brave.
It was brave to open our relationship.
It was brave to run wildly into our greatest fears.
It was brave to tell my love she could love someone else.
It was brave for Girlfriend to open her heart when she so wanted to keep it shut, when so much was at stake.
It was brave to see what we both were capable of, how we would function in a relationship without the promises of monogamy and commitment.
It was brave to get hurt, but stay. To not run when the pain came rolling in.
It was brave to let our most insecure, most desperate sides run amok.
It was brave to forgive what seemed unforgivable, to hold fast when others said to let go.
It was brave to believe the words of spirit, to trust the cards, to trust our intuition, to trust the messages meant something, and to follow them as closely as possible no matter what.
It was brave to offer the benefit of the doubt, to test the edges of truth.
It was brave to break up.
It was brave to stay together.
It was brave to open ourselves up to Girl, to be as vulnerable as possible, to let her in all of the way.
It was brave to let ourselves be rejected by Girl, and to let her reject us again. And again.
It was brave to test our limitations, to find the edges where boundaries should live.
It was brave to give ourselves the opportunity to choose one another.
It was brave to face the ugliest parts of ourselves and offer them love.
It was brave to let ourselves become who we have become.
So now, as I move forward, as I continue to heal and grow, my wish is to always be this brave. To always leap when the Universe calls me to leap, to step out and weather the storm with as much grace as possible, to let myself become new over and over and over again. To be brave enough to be everything. To be brave enough to let life touch me in every way possible. To be brave enough to love with no regrets. To be brave enough to truly live.
THE END (of this series, yay!)
1 comment
WOW!! What a wild, sensitive, fascinating and refreshingly open ride! I thank you humbly, Angela, for letting us all in to this definitely hard and bizarre thing. I am looking forward to the next installment of your blog to read over my coffee!